Won't know 'til ya get the therapy bill

I know that I often refer to my one year old and three year old as "monsters", "maniacs", "stinkers", occasionally "rotten turds", and so on.  But if I really think about it, they're not too bad.  And here's where I brag a little...They have awsome sleeping habits (11 hours a night and a 2-3 hour afternoon nap, granted, I run them like dogs), and they don't give me a hard time about going to bed.  They clean up their own toys without much hassle.  Meals aren't difficult.  They eat their fruits and veggies.  They put their shoes away and put their dirty clothes in the hamper.  By no means are they little angels.  They throw tantrums and get mouthy...that little one is quite a wise ass.  Their listening skills leave something to be desired.  They know how to push my buttons and do it more frequently than I'd like.  But at the end of the day, I'd have to say, they're really not bad kids at all.

I feel like I spend most of my motherhood musings on "how bad am I screwing these kids up?"  Am I too hard on them?  Do I let things go when I shouldn't?  When Paddy cries hysterically because he dropped a chick pea on the floor, I think, "is this really a bottled up reaction to hearing Tony and I bicker over the laundry?"  When Micky throws a toy car at Paddy's head because Paddy isn't playing his game, is it because I'm not teaching him how to express himself?  Though, I'm pretty sure that chucking HotWheels at your brother's melon is a one way of expressing anger and frustration...maybe just not the best. 

I'm going to quote my sister in law, Nette, "When you're a mom, it's all on you."  It's true.  Whether or not there's someone else to bear the burden, we, as mothers, feel the full responsibility.  My aunt once told me that she thought I was such a good mom to the boys.  My response was, "They seem ok now, but we'll have to wait and see how much therapy they'll need in 20 years."  Why is it when the kids are behaving and eating their broccoli, we're proud of them and reward them; but when they are kicking their sibling or screaming "NO" at the top of their lungs, we beat ourselves up and wonder where we went wrong?  Moms put in a lot of hard work.  That doesn't mean our kids are going to be perfect, but when they are good, it's ok to pat ourselves on the back.  If we're going to kick ourselves for the tantrums, we need to also take credit for the good manners.  With that in mind, I'm going to proclaim, "I've kept my kids alive and breathing, and they're actually pretty decent little fellows...because I'm a kick ass mom!"  Now I'm going to go reward myself with a couple of Double Chocolate Pepperidge Farm Milanos, and hope that I can pound them before the rugrats wake from their nap.  And hopefully I'll teach the boys the importance of good insurance, 'cause mom's not picking up the psychologist's bill.